What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

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Q: You know what's worse than being a mother? A: Almost everything, because being a mother is not a bad thing, in fact, it's a wonderful thing.

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'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks why the long face? The horse, unable to comprehend human speech, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

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Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

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Yo momma so pretty,she gets a lot of compliments.

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You tell me. I have amnesia.

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Nero, man, I mean I will hurt you, I am on my way to the hospital, and seriously that pic does not look real, seriously on a hospital? I mean man, I am really sorry! I nearly killed you, how was i supposed to know you do not care about your teeth and take half a bottle of that calcium stuff? My mom? Yeah sure! She laughed at the message you sent her, and if you touch my sis, ill kill you, anyway I am on my way, you better change your mind or I will kick your ass!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Yo mamma so fat when I searched her on the internet, I got 28,000,000 results

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Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies nothing child abuse is not a funny matter.

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whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

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Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the nazis we have reason to suspect that you are harboring illegal jewish fugitives and would like to check your house if it isn't too much trouble on your part.

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Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

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A guy walks into a bar and falls.

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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