When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in life's eyes. Then life won't trust you with lemons.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks: "why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus being incapable of comprehending the complexities of conversation said nothing, and shit all over the floor.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

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As they went down the hill Jack tripped on a rock, falling breaking many bones including his neck. In all the hysteria, Jill fell too, however she landed on a rock and now has severe dementia. This was all for a pail of water.

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Jake likes to have tickle parties with McCauley Culkin.

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How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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What did the Muslim say to the Jew? Nothing, as he has been deaf since birth and is incapable of forming coherent speech.

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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What do you do if you work in subway? we make the subs put meat on it then put salad on then cut it then wrap it other duites involved but cba to exsplain

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Why couldn't little Jeffy find his way to gumdrop palace? Because he was shot

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What did the sign say? It said slow down

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What do you call a horse with bread on its ears? Boris, because that's his name.

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Go to this website and this game is an antijoke to laugh at http://iamhelenkeller.com/

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How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

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What did the man dying of cancer want for his birthday? To live.

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

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What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

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Did you here about the Asian couple who had a stupid baby? They named him Sum Ting Wong

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Q:What do you call a black priest? A: A great quality volunteer at a local church.

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Why did Kelly lose all interest in men? An aneurysm in her brain popped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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