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How many arabs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. We also have a black president.

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

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My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

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why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

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Once upon a time there was a king who had a daughter. She eventually grew up and contracted aids got run over by a bus and shit her pants..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause it wanted to

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There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

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Of course, you have always found more joy in seeing others happy, that pursuing your own happiness.

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What did the man do after his wife died? He farted.

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Q:What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

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funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

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The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

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Why don't birds cry when they get hurt, lose a loved one, or watch opera? How the f*** should I know.

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-Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? -No. -Well niether has he.

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"What did one Chinese say to each other" "I don't speak chinese.......!"

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

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There is no I in team... But there is a u in suck. There is no I in team, but there is in awesome

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a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

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A blind man walks into a bar... He tragicly attracts aids and dies as the bar is shut down for health purposes

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AntiJoke will not let me type this so I will add some spaces. N I G G E R.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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