- Anti Joke

What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? What you probably have is a lawyer on holiday with his children, allowing himself or herself to be buried in order to please said children.

An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman come across a magic slide. They each decide to take a turn. The Irishman goes first, sliding down and shouting "GOLD!", and finding himself in a pile of gold as he reaches the bottom. The Englishman slides down screaming "SILVER!", and lands in a heap of silver at the bottom. The Scotsman takes his turn, and shouts "WEEEE!" as he slides down. He gets up and realises what a needless waste of a wish his enjoyment cost him.

What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

whats black dirty gross and sits on the porch all day? a trash bag

what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

there once was a man from Afghanistan. Who wanted to bang his brother-istan. they licked and sucked. and kissed then f**ked, he got aids. and never did that-again!

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

whats the difference between boyscouts and a jew? boyscouts come back from camp.

A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

knock knock who's there? banana well that's an odd name. banana then began to break down in tears because his parents were constant drug abusers and gave him that name while they were high

A man walks into a bar Ouch He broke his penis So he ate it Then he saw a little boy They shaved their pubic hair together He raped the little boy He walked into another bar Double ouch

What happened to the man who went to a strip bar? What happens to all of us. He died.

What did Zeus say to Hades? Nothing. Both are mythological beings created by the Greek civilization to explain why many things in the world happened, mostly because of a lack of modern science.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem doesn't make sense Potato

How do you kill a diabetic? Take away their insuline

My friends new nickname is hawk-eye! He is a jackass...

What did the boy in the striped pajamas get for Christmas? A shower.

What did the dog get for Christmas? euthanization

why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."