knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because he would scare the shit out of everyone, and come to think of it wasn't even sure he had been invited.

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What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

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What did the senator do after he typed he email? He clicked the send button.

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Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

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That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

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What's worse than 13 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 13 trees...

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Person 1:Did you hear the joke about the cat, the camera, and the pancakes? Person 2: No, I haven't. Person 1: Oh, that's too bad. Person 1 then gets up and walks into a refrigerator.

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What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

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If Apple made a house, would it have Windows?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Rapist :(

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Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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One sunny Tuesday morning, Tom and his friends were outside playing at the park. Then, suddenly, a violent storm was rapidly approaching. It was recommended that everyone should seek shelter immediately.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

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Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

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Listen, I cannot as much as I would like, to take the full responsibility for every decision my former followers might decide to make of their own, we are no religion nor do we follow any kind of doctrines, we encourage freedom but also respect for our fellow human beings, all of them regardless of race or affiliation. But you let me know whoever has as much as looked at you the wrong way, and I will make sure they no longer find themselves welcome within my order, nor anywhere else if their actions merit the firm hands of justice.

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Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

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What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

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what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a convicted cannibalistic rapist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops