Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, your body rejected the transplant and you died.

Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

How do you make a white girl commit suicide? Bully her.

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

Why didnt Stevie Wonder wave back at the white man? Because he's a racist.

My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

Hey man. what? squidbillies.

did you know towels can cause dry skin?

Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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