Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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Why did a Jewish man have no hair left? He recently got a haircut.

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How do you find the richest man in Mexico? Go through government records and tax files and find the person with the highest salary

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What did the Jew do before the movie? He turned off his cell phone.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? because she had no arms. --- Knock, Knock Whos there? Not Sally.

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chuck norris and superman had a bet. Chuck norris immediatley won because superman is a fictional character played by an actor. Chuck norris then decided to have a bet with the actor that played superman and lost

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What did the taxi driver say when the black man got in to his taxi? Where to sir?

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A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

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What's long and black The unemployment line

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? Tree sap.

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What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

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Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

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Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually, 6's fear was totally irrational, and thus unexplainable. This sort of fear is generally referred to as a phobia.

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What do you call a black priest? "Father" if you are Christian.

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

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What was so funny about my sister getting raped? Nothing, there's never anything funny about someone getting raped, especially when it is a close friend or family member

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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