What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

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What's the new green? Green

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How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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Wanna hear a joke? no

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Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

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Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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Why did the car's airbag go off? He hit a boy eating his ice cream

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

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Your mother is so fat; I love fat fat people.

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why does the man appear fat he is

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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A man walks into a bar and breaks his nose, he asks the bartender for help The bartender says "no you're a f***ing idiot"

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Wolf Wolf who? Wolf who!? Is that really the first question that comes to mind when confronted with a talking wolf?

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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drugs.

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Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

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Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

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what did the anorexic girl eat today? nothing..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops