What did the kid in the wheelchair get for Christmas? AIDS.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

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A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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WILLYS

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What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

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Why does the Taliban forbid people from having sex standing up? It might lead to dancing. And then, of course, death.

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What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

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knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

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i remember when i was a child i wanted a skateboard but my parents would never buy me one so late one night i crept downstairs and got a hammer and some wood and i beat them to death my foster parents baught me 5 skateboards

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

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Mario walks into a bar A yak walks into a bar An orange walks into a bar 30 men barf in a juicy yot

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why is the melon having a wedding? Because it cantaloupe.

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Knock Knock there's a doorbell

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A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

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What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

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How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

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What's Michael J Fox's favorite toy? While, a magic 8-ball might first appear to be a good guess. Let's be honest, those things really lose their luster after the first couple times. More likely it's something like a sports car or big screen television.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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