Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

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Have you seen Andrea Bocelli's new house? No. He hasn't either.

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I read a haiku. It was honestly quite good. That's basically it.

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What did the world's greatest bowler say when he got a gutterball? "Spare me the irony!" Get it? It's because he's made of metal.

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Mum, "Why aren't you listening to me, are you deaf or something?" Son, (Silence)...

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Why didn't the millionaire jump off the Golden Gate Bridge? He said "I don't have to commit suicide, that's for poor people" (Wyndellberg)

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Balls

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What did Batman say when he saw Robin? Hey look it's Robin

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What did the truck driver get when he ran over my cat? A pave low.

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bunnies are fluffy just like yo mama

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How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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In Soviet Russia, you wouldn't have a likely chance of surviving because of Stalin's mass paranoia and total neglect for his fellow man.

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What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Yo mama so stupid, she waited for the stop sign to say go

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I have three heads and nine eyes, what am I? I'm a liar.

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Your Mom

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops