Justin beiber..

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teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

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Okay, but lets write a contract, if you regret your decision at anytime, you get it all back, minus what I have spent of course, both I and my wife have always wanted to live in a house by the sea, hopefully you nearby. You know, I have never been truly happy because I thought I could change this world, now I know that I tried and failed, maybe I can change myself instead, they say that true change comes from within.

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Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

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these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

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What's the worst part about aids? Telling your wife and kids.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? The baby is not a car.

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What do stupid fat ugly women always say to me? “I think you have a problem with women.”

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What comes out of a zit? Purple poop.

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Three Jewish men walk into a butcher. They dont buy any pork products and thank the butcher for his services.

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why did a guy try to rob me? because he was black.

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What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

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What's bad about the the 3 black Jews that just died...... They were my friends

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What do you you call a mexican that jumped the border? successful

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom likes dick and so do you

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What's the difference between tires and a black guy? Tires don't scream once there are chains around them. ;)

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Did you hear about the three Arabs that hijacked a plane? They drove it into the Pentagon.

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Why could't Jerry go to school on the Wednesday? Because he died on the Monday.

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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Max Head fingered himself, HAH

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Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

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What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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