Policeman: Knock, knock. Woman: Who's there? Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed.

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roses are red , thankyou for stating that , i can now continue with gardening as it is my profession.

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Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme others don't.

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I was going to write about anti-climaxes but then I didn't.

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roak

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what did timmy from southpark say after his warther melested him? TIMMY

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why do black people like kool-aid? it's a tasty refreshment

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A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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Dude! That movie was so gay! It had a bunch of naked men having sex with other naked men!

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how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

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What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

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Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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What say the mirror if i look in it,? He died

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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Why did the man shoot himself? Because he already shot his wife.

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People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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An american family is picknicking on the bottom of the ocean. They are eating french fries, big mac's, chicken mc nuggets and drinking coca cola, some slurpies too, all purchased at the local mac donalds near lyndon blvd, in chevy chase near that weird house with the toothless lady that always smiles and then all of a sudden frowns at you, often wearing either a dark green or mint green dress. Spongebob squarepants comes drifting by dead in circular pants and little Sally, their youngest daughter asks a question, which cannot be heard because they're underwater.

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What should you say when someone says a bad joke? I'm sorry, your joke cannot be completed as dialed. Please hang up and don't try again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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