Whats long,hard, and has c.u.m in ig? Cucumber....also my wiener

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Why did the black man walk into the white house? Cause he lives there because he is our president

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Hitler: A jew walked into a bar... jokes, it was a gas chamber

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

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A three-legged prostitute, a coal miner, and R. Kelly walk into an all-midget rendition of Stravinsky's Rite of Spring. The miner has a heart attack and dies. The concubine and the vocalist do nothing to help.

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what's white, got three legs and you wouldn't expect to find in the rainforest? A fridge on a stool

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets Wet.

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What do you call four black people in a car? A family road trip.

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What's worst than a holocaust 2 holocaust's

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your mommas so fat she should be worried about getting diabetes

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What's in a glass and drinky? A drink

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Knock knock! Just kidding.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

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roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

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a blond girl walks into a bar

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how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

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Why was New Zealand attacked by Australia? New Zealand attacked Australia due to a teritorial dispute. The war lasted for 3 years with over 150000 deaths.

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What happen to the girl that did the splits. Her legs broke.

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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"i once had a rabbit named socks.he was a funny little fellow until one day he got over excited and...well..." "did he...i mean..you know..did he...?" "what?lose a claw,throw up, sit in a pan of warm water until he calmed down?" "yeah! :)" "yes...but then he died."

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mike:what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas tom:cancer ahahahaha mike:he got a skateboard jerk nararrator: this skate board will be worth less because he has no legs

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Covert trance, black Ops, and something I kinda made up myself. The first two are basically using suggestions without the victim being aware of it, that is how that famous bank robber that just asks nicely for all the cash and gets it succeeds. The other is tricking the "allmighty" subconcious and again, my own invention people claim its called "this and that", I know, because I coined most of the terms. Anyway, you put people into a deep state of trance, you tell them to take a step forward into the sea, and well, you actually led them down the top of a skyscraper or something fun... "Now... Suck on the lollipop I have between my, okay ill stop"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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