Why did an asian lawyer commit suicide? Because his wife left him and he hated his miserable life.

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what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

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Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer

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Awe the sky is crying.... No it's peeing

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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A handicapped man walks into a bar...

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What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

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Q: What did little Timmy get from his mother this Christmas? A: The contents of her will.

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What did the boy get at the bowling alley for his birthday? a corpse. *from Bones

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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So a little girl walked into a bar... A concerned adult then told the bartender. The bartender's name was Jim. Jim then asked the girl if she knew her phone number. The little girl said nothing and the bar tender was perplexed at the petrified look on the girls face. Jim the bartender then called the police and explained the situation.Once the girl was brought back to the police station it was learned that she had been missing for three months in a nearby county. The police then return to the bar to find that the owner had multiple kidnapped little girls in a cage under the bar that only he and the kidnapped girls knew about before the cops and Jim the bartender discovered it. The police then arrested The owner of the bar. He stood trial and was senteced to death row, he remains there today.

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How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Cuz she had no arms! B I T C H

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Two gophers are in a tank One of them says how the heck do you drive this thing?

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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Why did little Katie fall off her bike? Because the postman killed the bee hive.

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What do you call a bad joke website? anti joke

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Robin, get in the car!

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What did the computer say to his girlfriend? I'm going to RAM you tonight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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