A man is driving the speed limit of 55 on the highway. He gets pulled over and the cop says, "Do you know how fast you were going sir?" The man replies "Well yes I was going 55, the speed limit." The cop says, "No you were going 80." The speedometers broken.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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Hitler walks up to a little girl at a concentration camp: - How old are you? - I'm turning 7 tomorrow! - Nope.

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I meant to state that I threatened to kill him unless he refused to state that I broke his knees (and broke his wrists, I forgot to mention that too, such misery... ...Give a real man a chance here, its not every day I have to kill my mother... But you still wont hear me whining about it, asked my wife if she forgave me if I spent the rest of the day smirking, after all my mother "had visions" where my wife was Satan, which is fun, since I was also Satan the day I was born... Because my name is Nero... A NAME SHE GAVE ME! Still, not very dignifying getting the shit beat out that old hag because she was on some blend of angel dust, and still not so fun killing her by biting half her neck off... ...Literally not so fun, kinda fun? You bet, tasted disgusting, watching her choke to death was...Lets just say I have shared enough joy with you for one day.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Getting raped..

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What's the difference between a white guy playing basketball and a black guy playing hockey??? There is none..they hardly get playing time!!

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Roses are Orange Violets are Green I'm Colorblind..

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Q: What do you get when you put a boy and a girl together in a locked room? A: Blood and gore.

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What do you call a gay black man? Whatever his name happens to be

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What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

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What's a computer without Internet? A computer.

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what did the dog say when he walked in to a bar? Bark

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Q: What do you say to a person in a wheelchair who fall downs the stairs? A: Nothing because most likely they would take an elevator.

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What do you do when you eat a loaf of bread? You throw it up because your brother made it

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A Penguin Waddles into Abercrombie and Fitch.

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How do we stop world hunger? We must first ask ourselves: why don't people eat?

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Two muffins are in the oven, one muffin says "Gosh it's hot in here!", the other muffin says "HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!".

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In Soviet Russia, there was a population of approx. 293,047,571 people. It was dissolved in 1991, it is now know as Russia or the Russian Federation.

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Your dad got tired while running, so he stopped running.

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Why do people go on this site? They have no friends and no lives.

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Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

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One early Christmas morning i went downstairs. My mother told me that she had gotten me the ultimate stocking stuffer. It was a foot

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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