Whats black and white and says moo? A Dalmatian retriever with a voice box.

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Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

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What did the Germans cook in their giant oven made for cooking jews? Jews.

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was very hungrey and saw some seed on the other side.

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Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

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What do you call a bunch of whiteguys running down a hill? An Avalanche What do you call a bunch of black guys running down a hill? A Mudslide What do you call a bunch of mexicans running down a hill? A Jailbreak

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootise pop? No, seriously, does anyone know?

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Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

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What does a Barbie Doll and Britney Spears have in common? They're both 100 percent plastic.

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ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, I OFFERED YOU SOME CEREAL, MADE OUT OF MY DOGS POO BY VICKY AND RENATA WOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

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Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

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Where do you find a quadriplegic? Where you left him

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i am 26 why was i kidnapped 13 years ago cause i was in a badly written play

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Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

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why did the kid get in trouble. Because he put this up in typing class -charles hall aka chuckles

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How do you confuse a blonde?? Throw her in a circle room and tell her to find all the corners If she comes out and says I found the corners.. then your screwed

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What do you call a kid with leukemia and no arms? Names.

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why do black people like watermellon? becasue it is a delicious red fruit at a wonderful price

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Hey are you from tennessee? Because I recognize your accent and I grew up there also.

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops