Why was the girl crying? She just got diagnosed with cancer you inconsiderate bastard.

What was the last song those aboard the Titanic sang? "Staying alive"

Why did the homeless man decide it was time to get off the streets? He wanted to save face.

Knock knock! Who's there? ADHD ADHD wh-? SQUIRREL!

Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

What's worse than a paper cut? 2 paper cuts.

good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fucking dead.

What happened to the man taking a shit? An unfortunate drop of water splashed back onto his arse

Q: What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage. But I don't have a pile of dead babies either. So, yeah.

What do you put in a toaster? Bread, or sometimes a small penis.

Knock Knock Who's there? The IRS. You've been convicted of tax evasion.

what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

What's worse than someone who thinks Sting is a nice guy? Sting.

What is more addictive than World Of Warcraft? Heroin

What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

Why did the boy stop working on a farm? His country became more economically developed.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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