When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

( I PLAYED SKRILLESX's SONG ON MAX VOLUME ) My neighbours loved? this so much they invited the police round!

thumb_up thumb_down +124

What's white and red all over? A baby in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +116

Roses are red, violets are blue Vodka is cheaper that dinner for two.

thumb_up thumb_down +96

Joshua Brown was in a dark forest, with a misty haze surrounding him. He turned quickly and flicked his hair out of his face. Dylan Hodge appeared and they had wild sex all night!

thumb_up thumb_down +76

Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Who's better than badboy? The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Hola.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

thumb_up thumb_down +50

You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Whats Red and smells like Blue Paint? Red Paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A Hindu, a Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They then proceed to brutally murder each other due to their strong religious differences.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A guy walks into a bar and thinks of a superlative anti-joke. After having an enjoyable time at the bar he then promptly goes home and posts it for the world to see.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Lets see how many dislikes this can get.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

The.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? He was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops