a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the soan of 5 hours.

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what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

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Q. What's like a square block of ice? A. A refrigerator.

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Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

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What did the man with paranoid schizophrenia say? I suffer from paranoid schizophrenia.

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What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

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-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

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What is the difference between therapist and the rapist? A space.

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Why are anti jokes funny? You can trick an old person to think they are

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I know animal testing is cruel, but my dog did really well on the SATs.

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-Whats worse than a joke with no punch line? -What?...

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Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

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knock knock whos there? doctor doctor who?

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A dwarf walks under a bar.

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What's worse then a worm in your apple You took a bite outta that apple.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

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Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

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Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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Why did Tyrone try to sell Timmy some blow? Due to his poor educational background, lack of recommendations, and a terrible job market, Tyrone wasn't able to get a real job and had to resort to selling illegal narcotics. This wasn't something Tyrone wanted to do, because he promised himself he would never end up like his father, but this was the only way he could support his family.

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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French people.

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why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

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Cnorris can carry very heavy objects

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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