Why didn't Joe want to stand up? Because he had no legs!

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What if I told you.....potatoe

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Why did the black guy buy watermelon? It was on sale.

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What did the us reporter say? nothing as his head was in a isis members bin

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Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

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In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

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If a chicken and a taco cross a highway how many cats does it take to milk a turkey? Cactus cause the dog had two black eyes

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Yesterday I saw a blind man walking down the street, I asked if he needed help and he said "I'm fine thanks." Later on I saw a deaf man walking down the street and asked if he needed help. He didn't hear me, he then fell off the curb and was hit by a car.

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What's big, white, and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

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Anne frank dies days before camp was liberated.

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Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

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What's worse than getting pulled over by the police? getting pulled over and getting a bloody tampon stuck to your forehead.

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What do owls and cars have in common? Nothing.

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What's the name of Hellen keller's dog? She doesn't have a dog, she's blind and deaf and would not be able to give it the adequate amount of care. Additionally, it's morally reprehensible to make fun of Helen Keller.

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Why didn't the black lady become a doctor? After being awarded a Guggenheim Achievement Grant for film, she decided rather than going to school for her doctorate to instead spend time traveling in India, doing service work with the country's rather large homeless population.

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One day there was a princess born in the jungle. The story goes, that she'd be saved by a grand champion - a Hero. So the day came that she fell in love. After a few magical years, they broke up and she realized that fairy tales are for little girls.

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. A number is a mathematical object used to count and measure.It is not a living thing and therefore does not possess thoughts and feelings.

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While out looking for sex last week I met a hooker who looked like a rhino. I said to her, "Do you charge?" She said, "Sir, I am arresting you under the Street Offences Act 1959. You do not have to say anything. But it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court."

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what do i refer too White people = Business Yellow People = Smart Black People = Drug Smugglers, Terrorists, Rapists etc

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Jack be nimble, Jack be quick... Jack didn't make it over the candle stick and died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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