knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

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Why was the boy crying on his birthday? He was being molested by his birthday clown who he was fully aware was his alcoholic costumed father.... And it wasn't his birthday.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a bowling ball? I dont have a bowling ball stapled to my tree

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He chickened out.

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what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? Because his parents are dead.

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Indians

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? I don't hammer the watermon

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What happens to an elephant when it rains? It gets wet.

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How does a black man cut his hair? At a hairdresser

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Phew, I was like thinking all like "I am really into this guy, we can like chat like this and stuff too right?"

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Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

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Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

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I played the spoon game. In a white neighborhood.

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If I was, yet this syndicate was a legal one, necessary in order to maintain world peace trough the means of economical stability and such, would this be acceptable to you? Hypothetically of course.

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What did the arsonist shout out in the movie theater? Nothing. He set the exits ablaze and said absolutely nothing.

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Why did the sloth swing from the tree? It hung itself.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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Why couldn't the pirate enter into the movie? Because he's dead.

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Knock knock Who's there. Interrupting cow, sorry you can see where this is going, just let me in without asking any more questions please.

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Why did 5 members of the Al-Qaeda walk into the bank? To make 5 seperate cash withdrawals

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A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

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your mother is so fat that I am concerned that her health is at stake and she may develop diabetes and heart disease

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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