Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

What's red and can't speak ? A strawberry

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

knock knock go away

yo momma is so fat she ate the rest of the joke

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

My Nan, that is all.

What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

Why did the boy have a rash? He didn't, it was a birthmark.

Knock Knock. Doors open

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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