Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

Friends are like lettuce; If you eat their head, they die

Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

why did the panda go to the store? to buy milk.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

Q: What do you get when you get a bunch of people who confuse dark humor for anti humor? A: This website.

"Have you guys ever seen Derrek Ashmores sisters? They are DTF if you know what I mean" - Jesse Ziegenbein

drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

What's green and brown, and if it fell out of a tree on you it would kill you? A billiard table?

There were two planes to take off.. One did, the other not at all..

What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

what class did Jimmy get an A in? None, he is dyslexic

why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

women are like puzzles because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote, puzzles still don't.

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

The chicks at the bar last night were do hot. The girls weren't half bad either

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first moneky.. Why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game.. Why did the 4th monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure..

Hickory Dickory Dock My dog died today.

Hello, my name is John, and you are reading this paragraph. Find the mistake...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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