Like does not mean said. You can blame Justin Bieber for that one, cuz he was like "Baby Baby Baby" and I was like "no"

What's cooler than being cool? An object at absolute zero

What do you call a orange BAD GRAMMER

Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

bologna

What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

Do you know what God said to Hitler as he approached the gate of heaven? ??????????????????

Yo Mama is like a gas station:pump and pay.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A hurt animal that should promtly be taken to the RSPCA for surgery.

an islamic man with a strange bag walk into thr airport. he is probably heading toward his flight like any other person.

whats worse than biting your apple and finding a worm? WWII.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

Little Timmy walks into an ice-cream store. He dies on impact.

Are you the only 10 I see? Because I'm blind.

What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener.

Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

Why did the gorilla have big nostrils? Because it was a trait passed on to him from his biological father.

A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

A blone walks into a bank in New York City and asks the bank teller for a $5000 loan because she's going to Mexico for 2 weeks. The bank teller said he would need some security for the money. The blonde tells him her new Rolls Royce is in the parking Lot and she hands him the keys. The blonde gets the money and goes on her trip. Another employee at the bank then parks the car in the underground parking garage. He later ffinds out the blonde is a multi millionaire. When the blonde arrives home from she pays back the $5000 and $15 interest. When the bank teller asks her why she gave them a $250000 car for security or needed the $5000 loan if she was a multi millionaire, the blonde answers, "Where else can you park your car in New York City and expect it to stillbe there when you return?"

What's as red as a Lobster? A Lobster

Okay, you seem sincere enough, thing is that I trust you, but your buddies, if you can vouch for them, then I at least know that you are putting your stepmother in danger if you decide to cover for your friends, besides you being such an emotional crybaby kinda gets me into trusting you again.

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings. Now hats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Three bee stings.

A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach is growling. "I sure am hungry." the sleepy bear said. So he found some berries, but spit them out. "These berries are far too bitter." the playful bear said. He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees. "That honey is good, but not that good." the jolly bear said. He then stumbled upon a cabin. "I wonder if there is any food in here..." the curteous bear wondered. The events that followed are now reffered to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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