Q: Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? A: Oh, I'm terribly sorry sir, I’ll replace this with a fresh bowl of soup and I’ll have a word with the manager to see if we can deduct a sum from your bill for the inconvenience we have caused you

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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What do you call it when a plane crashes into a school? A terrible accident.

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My parents died!

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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Why didn't Jane go to school last Thursday? It was summer. No one went to school last Thursday.

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mustang? I don't have a Mustang in my garrage.

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

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Knock, knock. Who's there? George. George who? Oh sorry, I thought this was number 52. my mistake.

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What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

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Don't you hate it when someone starts a sentence and doesnt fi...

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What do you call a really bad band? Nickelback.

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Why are trees green? I have no idea

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You're so sweet I have diabetes

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Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

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It said i can write my own joke so i did.

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why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

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You had better thumbs up this post.

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Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops