Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

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Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

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Women deserve equal rights.

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How many baby's does it to paint a wall red? It depends how many you throw.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A very unfortunate blind fish.

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Why couldn't anybody at school taste lunch? Nobody made lunch.

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

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Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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Why did the car's airbag go off? He hit a boy eating his ice cream

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Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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Roses are potatoes Violets are potatoes I like potatoes Potatoes.

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This would be racist to black people if they could read.

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Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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