What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

How do you know when you have had too much to drink? When you ran over 7 pedestrians and are lying in the back of a police vehicle

This would be racist to black people if they could read.

Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

Roses are potatoes Violets are potatoes I like potatoes Potatoes.

Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

why wasnt the baby cute? -because it was dead

How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

A young baby died.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

Your flying on a canoe, and one of the wheels breaks off. How many pancakes does it take to fix it? Trick question there is a gorilla on board.

Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

Women deserve equal rights.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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