It was the week of the school formal and a girl rang up her date and said I don't have a dress for the formal. He said ok the lets go out and buy one. So they went to the dress shop to buy one but the line was really, really long so they waited in the dress line for ages and ages until they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. As they did, the girl said well I suppose you need a suit, so they went to the suit shop, and again, the suit line was really long but they waited in the suit line and they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. Then the guy said, well if we want to go to the formal in style, then we will need a limo. So they went to the limo shop but the limo line was really long as well. But again, they waited in the limo line and they got to the front, paid and left. It was finally the night of the formal, she had her dress, he had his suit and they arrived in their limo. Everyone was having a great time and the the girl said to her partner, I'm a bit thirsty could you please get me a drink? So the guy went over to the drinks table and went to get a glass of punch but there was no punch line.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

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how do you get a blonde one-handed woman out a tree? wave

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Why did the little boy sit next to the big boy? Because he wanted to get raped by big Jake!

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What do u call a beaner when he stands up 4 foot nothing

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: He has a debilitating disease, it's called ALS.

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What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

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Why did the faggot cross the road? Because he was a faggot.

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What's the scariest thing about the dark? There's a black man in my bed.

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Why is there air? To blow up basketballs

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How do you run faster than a cheetah? Cut off its legs.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

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What is black, white and red all over? An interracial couple that has been shot and murdered.

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Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

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Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

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What's five miles long and has an IQ of 40? A democrat parade.

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Q. want to hear the biggest lie in the world ? A. sure A.I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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What do you call an Interlochen Arts Academy Student with no talent? A comparative artist

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How do get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum... ...and I'm all out of ass but still have plenty of bubblegum to sit down and chew in a quiet and leisurely manner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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