Why didn't the women make her husband a sandwitch? Because she was struck by a car as a young child and was told she could never walk again. Her family couldn't afford a wheelchair so therefore she is bedridden all day.

Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

what's purple and plastic purple plastic

How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

Once i tried to do math ! She wasn't getting wet so i stopped!

Why are there so many little girls falling off swing jokes? Because you tuch youself at night.

So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

Do you believe in love at first site? Or should I walk by again?

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Mexican and an American are on a plane. It crashes due to an oversight concerning its weight limit, killing all of its passengers.

how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

Where did Suzy go after the explosion? - Everywhere.

What do you get when two black men walk into a bar? A few salesmen celebrating their recent pay raise.

Why did the elephant cross the road? It was being poached

What made Qtip's so dangerous? Q-tip's music

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

Why did the rooster cross the road? Because he wanted to prove he wasn't a chicken.

What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

hey im leon and i love the chuckie

Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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