Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

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Yo mama so fat, when she went to a party, they took the apple from the roast pig's mouth, and they put it on her mouth.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing... she's ugly

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what do you call a mothers mothers father's brother's son's uncle's sister's brother's aunt's father's stepbrother's granddaughter's mom? I dont know... im asking you, why are you reading the answers then?

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Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

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what's black, white, and red all over? any red object

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a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

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What do you call a black man in an expensive car? A licensed driver.

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How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

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what did Tyrone get for Christmas he got shot by isis

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

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How do you evolve a Pikachu into a Raichu? You use a Thunderstone.

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a man killed wife. he successfully rid the scene of all evidence and buried the body under a bridge. unfortunately he forgot to bury the head and went to jail for life.

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Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

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whats blue and doesnt like cheese? the sky, i was only messing about the cheese

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what happens when you wake up inception

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What would you call a guy with no arms or legs in the water ? Well you would probably call for help, because he would be drowning seeing as how he has no limbs.

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My nipple is bleeding

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What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

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Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

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What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

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What's big? Jupiter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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