Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

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A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

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Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

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Knock Knock! we have a door bell ...ding dong. its broken.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

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shoe and shoelace. one is meaningless without the other

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Two men walk into a bar, the third man ducks.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, in fact, the "road" in this joke symbolizes the Mexican/American border. The chicken's real name is Esteban Jimenez and he crossed the "road" to reach his family on the other side so he can start his life over. In addition to this, Esteban's real dream was to establish a 401k and possibly go to law school so he could begin his own law firm.

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Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

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What do you call a black guy with a shotgun? A fine American citizen exercising his 2nd Amendment right.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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Whats blue, sticky and glows only during the morning? IDK -Lets go Mets

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

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girls basketball

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Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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Why was the protester tied to a tree? They were tired of him protesting.

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Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

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Hey, you have small hands.

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Why do you always find a dead baby in the last place you look? Because once you've found it, you stop looking.

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what did liam weir ask ethan. how much charge do you have

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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whats worse than one bee sting... two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings... the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust... three bee stings

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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