What do you get when you come across a blonde. Depression, because you want to do her, but you know that will never happen cause you spend to much time sitting on your ass looking at anti-jokes.

Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

Hey have you seen Stevie wonders house? No? Don't worry he has'nt either.

Why do you do when a homeless man asks you for money Scream bicycle and then run

What is faster? A mustang or a corvette? A fighter jet you stupid idiotic piece of crap!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

People with cancer.

Two 16 year old girls are chatting on their way to school: Girl 1 : "hey, is that a hickey on your neck? say, have you been naughty? is it Brian's mark?" Girl 2 : "That's not a hickey, it's a bruise. My dad came home drunk again last night and beat me up for no reason."

Guess what my nephew said yesterday? oh wait, i forgot hes dead..

if you want to see somthing funny, throw a small child imbertween two catholic priests!

funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

Why did the boy drop his vannlai ice cream?because Vannlia ice came.

Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

what do you have to do to confuse a blond? Nothing

:) Hey AMBY VALENT! Want to join our horsehead show below?? *Laughing track with that fat loud bitch that wont stop laughing making the actors stare at each other like douches* :/ Muuh, I dont really care im just some meh character anyway so yuh...' *Laughing track* ? ???? ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA! :( Hey get outta our show here you China man! *OOOH! Track plays with some fa*ott whistling* ? ???? | Baka! *leaves* *Awww track plays* *Laughing track*

Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

why did amelia earhart get lost? because she was a woman

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I didn't use protection So here's your baby

What's the difference between shoes and babies? You can't eat shoes.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead...

What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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