What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

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Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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An asian man walks into a taxi. The driver asked which chinese or electronic store woupd u like to go to?

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Why did Charlie eat a baked potato? Because he was hungry.

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Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark. Because he's a grown man, and most grown men aren't afraid of the dark.

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what happened to the kid who opened the goldfish? he got eaten by a cixelsyd dinosaur

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What's better than winning the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What did the rock say to the tree. It didn't say anything, rocks don't talk.

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Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

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There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

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What's better than 24-year-olds? Twenty 4-year-olds.

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Roses are Orange Violets are Green I'm Colorblind..

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Whats the difference between Jesus and the Pope. Jesus died 2 thousand years ago

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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Ask me if i'm a serial killer Are you a serial killer? Yes and I killed your family

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What do you call an old man in his underwear with a bag of pepper on his back while licking pebbles off the sidewalk? Senile.

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A White guy, Black guy and Hispanic are all on the same bus. They get off at their predetermined stops and continue their day.

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What do you call a Muslim guy on a plane? A passenger.

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what's better than winning the special olympics? -not being retarded

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knock knock, whos there? billy i dont know who you are, please get away from my front door before i call the authorities

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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