My grandma once told me " never trust the blacks"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why could susan not get up? Because her limbs were hacked off by a African militia group.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call nuts on a wall? Walnuts. What do you call nuts on your chest? Chestnuts. What do you call nuts on your chin My dick in your mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you stop a bus? throw a boy with an ice cream cone infront of the bus. but...come to think of it, that may not work. he might drop the ice cream on top of it >:l

thumb_up thumb_down -19

If Michelle rides her bike at 15 mph for 20 minutes and Erik rides his bike at 20 mph for 12 minutes, why is Michelle not in the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock, knock ... ... ... Well I guess no one is home.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A man walks into a bar and see's a 12 inch pianoist. He walks to the bar tendar and asks "Where'd you get it" The bar tendar says we have a genie in the back. So the man walks back the and wishes for 12 million BUCKS , The genie gives him 12 million DUCKS, The man walks back out and said " I asked for 12 million BUCKS not 12 million DUCKS and the bar tendar says do you really think i asked for a 12 inch pianoist?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Blonde: Hey, what does "Idk" mean? Blonde's friend: "I don't know" Blonde: Thank you for telling me, that has been bothering me for quite some time now.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

One day an irishman walked into a bar. he started to show off his accent when a nicely dressed lady said to him, "are you from ireland?". "AYE" said the irshman. " what part of ireland are you from?" drunk, the irishman replied "uh downtown" then the woman said, " did you come here alone?" then he replied"no i didn't come here a'lone.....DONKEY!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q. What's worse than 9/11? A. That one shark jumping episode of Happy Days.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

So the man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells the man " you will have to quit masturbating " So the man asks " why" And the doctor said " so I can examine you "

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the girl say to the boy? Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q:Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? A: Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Pikachu says "Pikachu!" Squirtle says "Squirtle!" Charmander says "Charmander!" Ash is upset because he cannot communicate with his Pokemon in their foreign tongue.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the bartender say to the man? can i have a beer if you dont get it the bartender asked the customer for a beer

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A man and a Rabbit are in a bar , the Rabbit looks at the man and says, none of this is real.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the Mexican steal a pack of tortillas? To feed his family. He didn't have the necessary funds to pay for it.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the Football Coach go to the Bank?? To Cash his Paycheck.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A dyslexic man's favourite clothing shop is Tampon.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's worse than winning the lottery? Anything, really...

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why is Justin bieber gay? Because he is atracted to men

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops