Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It is actually not a good idea to say "who's there" to the random person outside. The man could be a robber or a murderer, and will realize a person is inside. He could bomb the door down and do anything to kill you. You should look through the window first, or through the little peep hole. If the person outside is an acquaintance, then you can respond. However it is best to not reply and leave the stranger alone. Safety is key to living a happy joyful life.

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A man serves his wife dinner. She laughes and tells him it tastes funny. He then procedes to tell her that is because he put large amounts of poision into the food.

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg. Chickens evolved from their pre-historic ancestors who each laid an egg with a slight genetic mutation until one egg contained what is now classified as the modern chicken.

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What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What did little Timmy do in the Library? Read

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pickles.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? This year I'm going to win the golden brief case!

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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Homosexualism is so gay man

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

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Where's Waldo? In rehab. Waldo is in rehab.

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Whats the difference between Rolf Harris and a pedophile Whoops I didn't quite think this one through

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why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

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What do you call a guy with no legs and no arms? Mat.

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2 penguins in a tub. one looks to the other an says, "pass the bar of soap." the other looks at him.."what do you think i am, a typewriter?"

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What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

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Why did the man cry? Because his mom died in a terrible car accident.

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I man was taking a major shiit He forgot to wipe

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Why was the homeless man begging for money? Because he needed money to buy liquer for his severe alcohol addiction that was slowly destroying his liver.

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whats pink, brown, and smells like a banana. monkey vomit?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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