What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

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Chuck Norris will eventually die because he is a human being, just like all of us. His movies weren't very good either.

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All these jokes are very entertaining, but if you look closely, Lebron clearly travels. Wheres the call ref what the hell.

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

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Guy 1:Whats the difference between a towel and toilet paper? Guy2: I dont know Guy : SO IT WAS YOU!

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So there were these three guys on a plane, one with a ruptured hernia, one with a stomach infection and one with a raging case of gingivitis. Half way through the flight the pilot said, "unfortunately we will not it make to our destination... we are crashing." The three men then went to get the parachutes. they then say that there was only two. the man with the ruptured hernia picked one up and threw it out the door and pushed out the guy with the stomach infection. The guy with the raging case of gingivitis said, "why did you do that... we could have used that parachute!" the man with the ruptured hernia responded, "taco." and jumped out of the plane. the pilot then goes on the intercom and says," sorry. false alarm. we will not be crashing, please enjoy the rest of your flight."

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What starts with ''F" ends in "uck" and usually means excitement? A Firetruck

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Children and bretheren, stinky cheese Stinkyy cheeeese. Like this or you will smell stinky cheese in your bedroom

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Henry's mom packed Henry sweaters And lots of things besides sweaters Henry went to war He saw lots of gore Logically, he wouldn't need a sweater because he had to wear his uniform during the battle. Did i mention that Henry likes chocolate?

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Knock Knock Whos there Me Oh, come in

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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What do short Mexicans do after a hot shower? Dry off with a towel like everyone else,

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why didn't Lebron James give me a fourth quarter?...he forgot his wallet at home and didn't have any spare change.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a dead Jewish girl that lay on the other side. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

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What's funnier than 9/11? Nothing. 9/11 wasn't funny. It was a terrible tragedy, the most tragic in U.S. history. If you think that is funny you are a sick person. By: Logan in South Dakota

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Whats cold and can't climb trees? Refrigerator

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Why couldn't Jimmy run in the track race? Because he has been paralyzed since he was 3, due to a horrible accident

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what didn't I do when making this joke? Read and agree to the terms of service.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

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Getting all F's on your report card isnt that bad.... I mean you could go home to find your whole family murdered and your Girlfriend hanging from a noose.

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whats the diffrence between madeline macan and a submarine? there isnt one there both at the bottom of the sea and full of seaman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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