What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

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Knock knock. Its open.

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Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

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Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

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What did the boy reading the book do? He kept turning pages and reading until he came to the end, closed the book, and put it back onto the book shelf.

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What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

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How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

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What do you call a black man standing on a sidewalk? Preferably race shouldn't matter in this situation, but in most social circumstances the man would be described as black to elucidate the person being depicted.

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A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

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You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

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Pianos.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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