what happens on labor day? the day she has a baby... ya your having a kid

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? No.

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What's funny about anti-humor? Nothing.

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Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

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justin Beiber is gay. what else is there to say...

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A girl walks into a bar and the bartender says, "why is your face so tan?" And she replies "I just got back from the beach."

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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On Tuesday mornings at 7:32 a.m., what is the square root of 31? I don't know, because it would be an irrational number of which is not possible to calculate without the aid of a calculator. However, the date and time would not affect the answer.

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How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

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It's gone. It's all gone. There's nothing left.

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Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

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How babies can you fit in a car seat? 1

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Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

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Q: What do you call an exact duplicate of Homer Simpson who's been enhanced with numerous special powers and a strength-boosting inducer among other beneficial additions? A: A mobidly overweigth individual who hasn't realized what the phrase, "Go on a diet", even denotes/implies.

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What do you call two black people on one bike? Unsafe. Regular bicycles are typically not suited for use by two people at once, black or otherwise. Riding on the handlebars is dangerous and can lead to serious injury.

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Why did the little girl cry? She lives in Haiti.

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A blind man walks into a bar After realising he might be hurt everybody rushes to his aid

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One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

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knock knock... ....... no one replies.. the family is deff..

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Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

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What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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