What is the worst part about dying? no-one cause no-one has ever survived dying to know what it is like so how is it possible that I would know

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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The president is invited to a party at Bill's house. Suddenly the house catches on fire. Who survived? No one, they all died.

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A man said hello to a woman. He was italian...

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How do you confuse a Blondel? Tell her there's a demon in her liver

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A man walks into a bar, but it was a gay bar, and the man was a homosexual so he stayed and had fun then later that night he went home to his girlfriend

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Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

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I enjoy Popcorn

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What's funnier then a dead baby. Two dead babies.

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Timmy: "Dear Santa, why don't you ever come to my house?" Santa: "Because you don't have parents, Timmy" THE END

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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Gays always seem happy wonder why Straights complain to much

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin "Boy, it sure is getting hot in here," and the other muffin replies "yeah, that's because it's an oven."

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What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

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What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

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How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

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There was a white kid named Tyrone.

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Chuck Norris will eventually die because he is a human being, just like all of us. His movies weren't very good either.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

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A man visits an anti joke site looking for some humor. realizing that its not funny, he closes the window.

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What do you get when you mix Lil Wayne and Lil John? A full size John Wayne

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There once was a mountain climber. He loved to climb mountains. He had climbed all of the world's tallest peaks...except Mount Everest. So, one day he decides to climb Mount Everest. He takes weeks and weeks to prepare himself. He trains and trains three times a day till he thinks he is ready to climb Mount Everest. Climbing up it takes forever. It feels like it has been days in the dreary cold. Finally, he reaches the peak. It is a glorious occasion. On the way down, a huuuuge storm rolls in. He falls down a cliff and breaks both of his legs. The pain is unbearable. He screams and screams but no one hears him. Finally after what seems like days, a group of monks find him and carry him to their monastery. Chapter Two Once the man wakes up he thanks the monks for saving his life. They give him a room, food, and nice clothes. Every night in his room, he hears a banging behind his dresser. It is really loud and he is quite annoyed by it. The next morning he asked the head monk what the noise is. The head monk says " I cannot tell you, you aren't a monk." He hears the banging noise every night. HE asks the head monk every morning but he always says he cant tell him because he isn't a monk. So the climber decides to become a monk. After years and years of training to become a monk, he finally becomes one. Chapter Three So he says to the head monk, " I am a monk, so now can you tell me?" The head monk replies, " I can't tell you, but i can help show you. So he pushes the drawer back and reveals a little door, He gives the man a lantern and says to go through it. The man goes through the door into a little, dark tunnel, eager to finally find out what the noise was. He crawls for what seems like hours and hours and hours and days and days and days and days. He finally gets to the door where the banging noise is and opens the door. What he sees amazes him. Do you want to know what the banging noise was? I cant tel you, you aren't a monk!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Neglegence and irresponsibility of a farmer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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