A man finds an antique lamp at a garage sale. He takes it home and polishes it, and a majestic genie materializes. The genie thanks the man for freeing him from excruciating slavery, shakes his hand, and returns home to his overjoyed family.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He chickened out.

What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

why did the Chinese guy take steroids? He didn't he's naturally small.

Why don't nuns wear bras? Because god supports everything!

Ding dong Who's there Electricity

what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

How do you confuse a blonde? Explain the concept of time travel.

Q: What is the fastest way to get insulted? A: Go screw yourself m0therf0cker!

Why were black people mad about slavery? Because they didn't get paid in gum! Holt9 ;P

Why did the big refrigerator fall down the cheese Because i licked my own ear and it got scared and cheese for no raiSOnsD

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

What happens when you walk around with a kick me sign on your back? you get punched in the face. How are you supposed to know it says kick, you cant see your own back.

What's love like? Some people say it's like a lotus flower, others say it's like an orchid... Personally I'd like to say it's like a fire at the bottom of you're soul-- like when people sin and go to hell... that fire burns forever???

Why did the house stink? There were decomposing bodies under the floor boards.

:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

Women's Rights

What did the man say to the woman giving him a blowjob? That feels good.

Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A bleeding penguin.

what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

My mom says to me are you gay and i say are you gay (What did i just do)

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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