The man that loved birds so much that he played golf just to get a birdie.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have AIDS.

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What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

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A wise man once said, "I am wise".

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Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

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Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

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What do you call an obese kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

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What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

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Why did the man jump off a cliff? Because he was committing suicide.

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Why did Sally fall off a tree? She wanted to get down

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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What is the only day of the year when you're guaranteed to find me? The day I kill you.

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How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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what's worse than the holocaust? when starbucks puts whip cream in my hot chocolate and I didn't ask for it. created by KA

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Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

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knok knok whos there know one cares your gay

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

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A possesed goat: "moo"

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What do you call a group that has a microphone, a bass, two guitars and a drum kit? A Band

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Why doesn't Caillou have hair? Because he has cancer.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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