Q: Why could John say goodbye to his girlfriend ? A: He didnt have one

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what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

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What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

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Whats worse than losing your entire family in a car accident? Luikimia

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

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Bill had two options the red truck or the blue sedan. Your mother is a whore.

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How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

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What's worse than a shotgoun to the balls? Nothing.

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What did the genie say to the man that rubbed the magic lamp? Nothing, genies don't exist.

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Why does sammy have a cut on her arm? becuase her mom went to go stab her dad and missed

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How do you get a bear out of tree? You shoot it

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why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

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What did the monkey say to the other monkey Monkey can't talk

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What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

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I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Whats funny about a fat person dying? He died while eating friend chicken

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Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark. Because he's a grown man, and most grown men aren't afraid of the dark.

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A man walks into a convenient store and asks the cashier where the toilet paper is. She says aisle five. He goes down aisle five and there's no toilet paper.

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What did the rock say to the tree. It didn't say anything, rocks don't talk.

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Walking down a cold, lonely, deserted street is a 10 year old who lost her parents. she has with her in plain sight her fathers wallet, so full of cash that it is literally too full. all of a sudden, a black man with a gum jumps out from around the corner. he then proceeds to mug her and shoot her. thanking the man for playing cops with her using finger guns, she goes home with a new coffee mug and a stick of gum. she died three days later from unrelated incidents.

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How many lesbians did Tiger Woods bang? None, his standards are much higher than that

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How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? You don't, the giraffe is a savanah animals and there is no physical way for a giraffe to fit in a refridgerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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