Q.What's green and smells like grass??? A. Grass

What do you call a shoe with milk in it.... A milk shoe....

guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

I love telling anti jokes rather than jokes because I was born with a rare case of ebola and suffer from alcoholicationism

rocky is here again.......................

What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

Who is green? Mike Wazowsky.

Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

what did the stop sign say to the car? nothing.

My granddad fell down the stairs the other day... Yeh, we didn't find it very funny either.

How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

Two guys walk into a bar. Whoops did I say bar? I meant Hiroshima 1945. They got radiation poisoning and died slow painful deaths.

What's worse than finding out your dad has AIDS? Finding out your little brother also has it, but you and your mother don't.

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

what is the most confusing day in the ghetto fathers day

What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

Justin Bieber

Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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