How do you make a boy cry? Pour hot soup on his head.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was the man running? He needed to get somewhere fast.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There are ten million million million million million million million million million million million sub-atomic particles in the universe that we can observe. Your mamma took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened to the teenager who was raped and murdered? Who knows? They never found the body.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

thumb_up thumb_down -9

You wake, and up for a second you are dazed. Then you open your eyes slowly because you are afraid of what is to come. You then remember oh right I had a sleepover at john smith's house.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock Whos there Me Oh, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do Michael Jackson and most Catholic priests have in common? They're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's red and has wheels? A red car

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being hit by a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

So three Jews walk into a Biker Bar. Despite the fact that is was a self-proclaimed "Biker Bar", the group of men inside were in fact rather open-minded, and had no issues with new members. They had a rich conversation, and frequented the bar thereafter.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why is OK SUK WHANG's name on a gravestone? She thought she was way better than okay.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is the different between going to church and reading a newspaper? You can take your shoes off when you read a newspaper.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what did the judgmental teacher say to a challenged student? your stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Who is worse than Adolf Hitler? Lebron James

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in a van headed to the slaughterhouse.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left, so they proceed to make a left at the next stop and have a wonderful time in what many people consider the most wonderful place in the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A black man walks into a movie theatre... And pay for a ticket that would grant him access to watch the verity Of movies available to watch that month of screening. He picks the warhorse which was critically acclaimed by many respected critics. He watched and observed the positive and negative points of the the film. When it ended he took a long a ride home on the number 76 bus to ibswitch road where he lived during that time, and wrote about his opionion on the movie and how he thought the movie could be improved. He done this same routen for another six months, every saturday, until he died of aids shorty after a homosexual fling.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops