What do you get when you cross a penis with a dinosaur? A dicklodocus.

a man offers an innocent little child some candy from his van upon arrival the child is raped and beaten suverily. -teagan doherty-

I C U P White stuff

Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

Why was six afraid of 7? Because 7 was a terrorist.

Your momma is such a slut, that she has unprotected sexual intercouse several times throughout any given day, with many different men.

What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

What do you do when a bomb is exploding 2 inches away from you? You die.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She didn't. Despite losing her arms in a terrible accident as a child, Suzy persevered to become a renowned gymnast. After several turns as a champion Special Olympian, Suzy retired from sports in order to tour elementary schools as a guest speaker. She inspired thousands of disabled children across North America and was a highly-respected orator. Suzy sadly passed away in 2009 at the age of 62. She is survived by her two lovely daughters, Karen and Michelle.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Actually, violets are violet

My neighour knocked on my door at 2.30am last night, can u believe it? 2.30am? How rude I thought. Luckily I was still up, playing drums.

What's the difference between my mom, and a bag of garbage? A bag of garbage is incapable of contracting aids

Why was Hellen Keller afraid to answer the phone? This situation is impossible because Hellen suffered from scarlet fever, therefore she could not see or hear the phone.

Two cows are sitting in a bathtub. One cow says please pass the soap. The other cow says nothing, cause it's a cow, making it incapable if speech. The other cow was just a guy in a cow costume.

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

What's worse then three frogs playing leap frog? Nothing that would be awesome

What has 4 legs in the morning, 2 legs at noon, and 3 legs in the afternoon? A dog that got its hind legs chopped off, and then only got 1 prosthetic one.

Why is Obama black Because his parents were black

Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

How do you get a baby to start crying? Drop a brick on it. How do you get it to stop crying? Drop two bricks on it.

A Jew walks into a bar, he buys it.

Two women were sitting quietly.

How do spell____? awk moment when u try asking someone how to spell something over text but they have no idea what ur saying

how do you confuse a brunette? paint yourself red and throw a fridge at her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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