what's the easiest way to tell time? a clock

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whats worse than 10 babies in a blender 1 baby in 10 blenders

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What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

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Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

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What do you get when an elephant and a pig have baby? Nothing, mating between animals must take place between animals of the same species, thus making it impossible to cross these two animals

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Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

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Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

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Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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If a tree falls on a woman, and no one is around to hear it, what is a tree doing in the kitchen?

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What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a gay bar. They are closet homosexuals and are searching for partners to engage in consensual sexual intercourse with.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Kindly reject the offer and give it back to life.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's green and shitty? A bootleg stick.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

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A black guy wearing a mask runs into a store, points his gun at the cashier, steals some money and runs out. The police start an investigation the following morning

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That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

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Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

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What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

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That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

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How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

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Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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