Why can't penguins fly? Because their wings are adapted to swim and not to fly

Whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

Terminator XXXIVXXX Regensisysydioniosis. Watch as the terminators return in this year`s summer blockbuster, they return to a time before the birth of Connors grandfather and manage to destroy the world, then the only decision left is for humanity in another timeline to travel back as the terminators are destroyed, but they travel back again so that! But that wont happen before Terminator: Los Pollos Hermanos.

Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

This is in Spanish when you're not looking.Just kidding, that's not possible. It's actually German.

Three men walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

A dyslexic man's favourite clothing shop is Tampon.

Why didn't the little asian kid go to his friends party? Because he wasnt invited.

Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

You die of loss of blood, under a pile of first-aid kits

Roses are black, Violets are black, Trees are black, WHO BURNT MY GARDEN?!

What do a van and a pencil have in common? You can write with both, except with the van.

What's your guys names?

Q: Why did the guy ring the doorbell? A: Because he was sick of all the crappy knock-knock jokes

What did the Germans cook in their giant oven made for cooking jews? Jews.

What starts with F and ends with uck? Fire truck

Where's my baby??

What did Mel Gibson say to the African-American? I'm sorry

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...