Roses are red violets are blue ice-cream is yummy can I eat you

Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar, he doesn't let a minor disablity distract him from having a good time.

Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

What did the dinosaur say to the human? For one, dinosaur's don't talk. And two, humans were not roaming the Earth during this time.

How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

A man walks into a doctors office He has AIDS

Dad: hi son Kid: (looks sad and looks at the ground) Dad: what's wrong son. Kid:I raped a girl. Dad:Who? Did you rape son! Kid:mom.

What's brown and sticky? Most forms of excrement.

Knock Knock Whos there? Me. I am a psycopathic heroin addict, and i came to your house to violently rape you and kill your whole family. I dont have a family. Oh.

What did the cow say to the farmer who was driving by in a tractor? MOOOOOOOO!

Man 1: What's the difference between an elephant and a mailbox? Man 2: I don't know. Man 1: You'd make a terrible postman

What do you say to seduce a woman? Is that a mustache? WTF!

What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple?  Getting raped by a 10 foot scorpion.

This is my fist. Would you politely run into it as fast as you can?

What does a black man do when drives up to a STOP sign? Stops.

roses are red violets are blue get down your trousers cause im waiting for you

What does china and an 80 year old body builder have in common? They're both asian. I forgot to mention that the body builder is japanese.

What's black, white, and red all over? A: Me after domestic abuse.

Do you know why i dont write poems Because i thought that violets were violets OTARTS...WAS...HERE

What did lil' Suzy do when she got home from school? She was violently mutilated by a bear then continually but raped by a man she met on the Internet. Needless to say, she had a great time. -Harrison

Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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