What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

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Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

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hey im leon and i love the chuckie

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have Somthing To tell you F*** You

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What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

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"I saw daddy with mommy last night. I think he was stealing my milk."

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Q: If you're driving down the street in your canoe and the wheels fall of, how many pancakes does it take to shingle your dog's garage? A: 27, because bananas have no bones.

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Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

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Your mother is so fat that LOWERLOWEOROLWERLOWEH OIRH OWER IOWEJ OR OIJWE :JWEJKLR

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Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

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How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

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what would your nan do if she was alive right now? scratching the top of the coffin.

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How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

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What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

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Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

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Why didn't Superman save anyone on September 11? He was in a wheelchair.

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class is canceled. My professor died.

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What happens when you spend far too much money in a gambling machine during a solar eclipse on a leap year? You get poor.

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How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

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A man walks into a bar, buys a pint of beer, talks to his friends for while and leaves.

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Father "Why so down son?" Son "I've always been this short..."

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops