Why did the Germans conquer Poland so quickly? Heavy military manufacturing and Blitzkrieg battlefield tactics.

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? not your cheese, you probably stole it.

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Why was a member of the KKK laughing at another member who was his friend? Because he had just divorced his black wife who he recently found out that he had received AIDS from.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van.

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In the movie "Sherlock Holmes". Why is Sherlock Holmes gay???? Because he was chasing "Blackwood".

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What did the depressed man get for his birthday? a rope

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? Black people don't celebrate Christmas.

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"Have you heard the one about the trannie?" "No, what is it?" "Wow, that's offensive." -Juanita

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What did Juliet tell Romeo before they kissed? Kiss me Romeo

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Why did the black man get shot Cause someone shot him

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Abe Lincholn had a son, But he died

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Q. What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? A. A bench is an inanimate object used for sitting on while a Mexican is a human being.

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once i was a dog and u were a flower........... i raised my leg and gave u a shower :)

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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When I find out where you live I'm going to burn down your house, kill your family, and while your crying in you demise I am going to slit your throat.

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how do you get a scouters power level to 9,000? power levels dont exist in real life therefore cannot reach 9,000

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There are two muffins in a oven, the first muffin is chocolate chip and the second muffin is blueberry.

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What did the father say to his son? I'm leaving and I'm not actually your father.

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knock knock who's there who who who and if u sat something about an owl I'll kick u in the face u fat cike

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A raccoon walks into a bar. He then proceded to bite 3 people before animal control got him. A black man, hispanic man and an asian man. Later they all walked to the hospital and were treated for rabies, they were all fine as rabies is normally not fatal when caught early. Moral- this story is racist cause the white man was completely unharmed, DONT DISCRIMINATE!

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Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

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An Irish man, Scots man and a Welsh man walk into a bar. The barman says, "what is this some kind of joke?!" Peter, who lives in Cardiff, returned home, depressed that he is viewed as some sort of clown. It reminded him of when he was a school boy; a giant spot appeared on his nose. The kids just laughed at him. "Don't worry Peter" he said to himself, "It will all be over now... He later hung himself. His family have been informed.

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How do you kill a vampire? Because vampires are figments of society's imagination and actuall living creatures, this task is impossible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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